Then the CIA storms in and tries to kill Marky Mark and his daughter.
#Transformers age of extinction blockdown movie
Oh yeah, and an old truck that Marky Mark bought from the movie theater turns out to be Optimus Prime. Mixed in there somewhere is a bit with some CIA guys teaming up with an evil Transformer named Lockdown, or Lockout, or whatever to hunt down the Autobots. A character remarks that movies are all shit nowadays because they’re “sequels and remakes… bunch of crap.” This really happens! Then we cut to Marky Mark’s wacky inventor purchasing an old projector from a rundown theater. Then we cut to the present, where some people find a dinosaur encased in metal in the Arctic. I wept for the innocent brontosauruses (brontosauri?) that were slaughtered. Dinosaurs are killed by a “Transformium” bomb in the opening. It is all over the place in the first 20 minutes or so. Who knows? I’ve already forgotten half of it and I just finished watching it. So what is this one about? I’ve totally forgotten the others. What happened, Michael? What do I have to do to see a Hispanic gentleman exclaim “¡Dios mio!” as his taco truck transforms into a 40 foot tall robotic Speedy Gonzales?
Sure, there’s a woman of Chinese descent working as Stanley Tucci’s character’s assistant, and Ken Watanabe voices a Samurai Transformer, but that’s about it. The movie is bereft of minorities in general Michael Bay seems to have pulled away from his usual embrace of crass Americana, leaving Transformers: Age of Extinction his most boring movie since The Island. How long until a loud black woman starts yelling at people?ġ2 minutes, though she is never seen again afterwards. How do they keep coming up with these completely original stories? It’s crazy. I mean, robots are fighting other robots and the CIA. Yeah, I was having trouble keeping up with the nearly three hour runtime. Wouldn’t you have been completely lost if they left anything out? I’m sure the complexity of the story necessitated the runtime.
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